This article critiques the landmark Report of the Commissioners Charged by the King to Examine Animal Magnetism, now widely known as the "Franklin Report." The authors mount a defense of D'Eslon, the disciple of Mesmer who conducted the "experiments," designed by the Commissioners that debunked animal magnetism as the mechanism responsible for dramatic alterations in behavior and medical cures following the application of Mesmer's procedures. The authors identify deficiencies in the commissioners' methods, discuss difficulties inherent in drawing strong inferences from the experiments they conducted, and contend that the commissioners missed an opportunity to elucidate the manifold ways in which mesmerism mapped onto important psychological constructs and phenomena. The authors adopt a fanciful approach by couching their critique in a sympathetic response to D'Eslon, who appears to one of the authors in a dream and voices his reservations about the commissioners' efforts.