Balancing listening and action is key to supportive parenting

Abstract

Parents convey high-quality listening when they pay close attention and show acceptance and comprehension of what their child expresses. These behaviors are fundamental to supporting closeness and autonomy, increasing well-being, and fostering future self-disclosures. Whether and how parental listening is balanced with action may depend on the domain of interaction. When children and parents are exploring each other's perspectives or sharing, and when children are seeking comfort for worries or sadness (attachment), listening dominates. When parents are called to discipline or keep safe, listening helps inform parents' actions, but may need to be curtailed to ensure effective action. Models of parental listening and action represent a next step in the literature and inform research in self-determination theory and perceived parent responsiveness.